La plume de mon spuncle

There’s a thing called The 519 Church Street Community Centre which has Queer Parenting Programs. There is, naturally, a guide to language. To inclusive language, that is. The kind that includes everyone by carefully avoiding words like woman and sister.

Pregnancy and Birth

Pregnant person

Person who gives or gave birth / Birthing Parent

Pregnancy Leave (vs Maternity Leave)

Parental Leave (vs Paternity Leave)

Carrier Mortality (vs Maternal Mortality)

Carrier mortality. You have to pause to savor that one. They be “inclusive” by hiding the fact that it’s women who die in childbirth. Carrier mortality. Women might as well be incubators.

But eventually it gets funny.

Families

Sparkle (an older beloved one, e.g. vs Auntie or Uncle)

Sparkling (a younger beloved one)

Spuncle (a known sperm donor in the child’s life: sperm + uncle)

Spauntie (female-identified partner of a Spuncle)

Grand Spuncle / Grand Sparkle (parent/s of the Spuncle)

Spuncle. Spuncle. Spuncle.

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