Guest post: Gender expectations

Originally a comment by Michael Haubrich on Gender is the expected, coerced, and enforced default.

Gender expectations put incredible demands on our behavior, and I don’t find it surprising that the resulting dysphoria has been identified. What dismays me is that most of society has come to accept the idea that bodies must be altered to resolve the issue in place of working with the person to find ways to overcome the problem. With the prevalence of childhood sexual abuse becoming more apparent seemingly every day, it hardly seems surprising that children and teens are trying to find a way to work through it, and here comes social media to tell them there is a “fix” that will align their gender to their bodies – by altering and disfiguring their bodies to look like the other sex.

I was known as a “pussy” in my small midwestern town because I was risk averse and didn’t see the point in scuffling to have fun, and I wasn’t athletic and our family hunted gophers, squirrels, and rabbits rather than big game such as deer and bears. There were a lot of boy skills I just didn’t have, and I got along great with girls as friends. But, I learned how to fake it as I grew up and eventually came to be comfortable with who I am. And, being straight, my experience with making friends with girls as girls rather than objects, certainly helped me in my sexual relationships.

This early intervention in puberty may seem kind in one sense, but I do believe it serves to prevent human development as an adult. Telling kids that they were born wrong and that the solution is to “pause” puberty until they can decide if they are really boys or girls inside deflects some of the pain of being gender non-conforming because it is an answer and for the rest of society it certainly makes things easier. We can forget about addressing the problems that gender stratification causes if all we need to do is medicate our kids to accommodate it.

Plus, there’s always the parents so bored with Indigo Children they have moved onto transing their kids.

And when the kids grow and realize that they still have the pain of having been mistreated, molested, or sexually abused since they never had true help, well, then, that’s not our problem anymore.

We have these bad stats on suicides by teens who don’t get, as Chase so deceptively calls it, “trans healthcare,” but do we have any stats on the suicides of those who want to detransition but find the road so hopeless that they commit suicide?

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