Author: Ophelia Benson

  • Oh dear, what seems to be the problem?

    If four courts tell you No, then try a fifth. Don’t worry about boring people or being a nuisance or making a fool of yourself.

    Danish Muslims are planning to take Denmark’s Jyllands-Posten daily to Europe’s highest human rights court over the publication of satirical drawings of Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessing be upon him)…The move comes a day after a Danish court rejected a suit by seven Muslim groups against newspaper editors for publishing the offensive cartoons…”It is a known fact that acts of terror have been carried out in the name of Islam and it is not illegal to make satire out of this relationship,” the court said.

    Well that’s the problem, isn’t it: it is not illegal to make satire out of this relationship. That’s what we’re saying. It should be illegal. It should be illegal to say things we don’t want to hear. The law should say ‘Nobody may write or say or sing anything that these seven Muslim groups don’t want to hear. Never you mind how you’re supposed to know what that is; use your common sense.’ The law would say that, if Denmark weren’t such a poxy secular infidel decadent feeble degenerate impure shithole of a place. Why did we ever come here? Well apart from the jobs and the prosperity and the freedoms and the drink and the infrastructure and the peace and the good governance and crap like that.

    Thursday’s ruling was the fourth by Danish courts to reject legal charges against the daily….The drawings, considered blasphemous under Islam, have triggered massive and sometimes violent demonstrations across the Muslim world and strained the Muslim-West ties.

    And rightly so. Because the drawings are considered blasphemous under Islam and therefore no one in the world ought to be allowed to draw such drawings because what is considered blasphemous under Islam ought to be considered blasphemous by everyone everywhere because Islam is – well because Islam is Islam and so everyone ought to obey it. Not everyone is under Islam, but everyone ought to be, so people can’t just ignore what’s considered blasphemous under Islam, because if they were doing the right thing they would be under Islam. Because Islam ought to be in charge of everything and everyone and telling everyone without exception what to do. And if they won’t do it we’ll just sue and sue and sue and sue until finally they’ll get so bored they’ll give in.

    Bilal Assaad, Chairman of the Islamic Faith Society, one of several plaintiffs, also lamented the court ruling…”We had hoped that we could put this unfortunate matter behind us and that the High Court would draw the line that establishes the limits of freedom of expression in religious matters.”

    You see we want the High Court – of Denmark – to draw the line that establishes the limits of freedom of expression in religious matters in a place where we want it to be drawn rather than where the High Court or the people of Denmark or both want it to be drawn. We get to decide these things you see because we are Religious Leaders and in particular we are Muslim Religious Leaders so courts ought to be drawing lines where we say they should be drawn and not anywhere else. Because what we say goes. Can’t say fairer than that, can you.

    Following the cartoons crisis, Muslims in Denmark and worldwide took many initiatives to remove widely circulated stereotypes about Islam in the West. Danish Muslims established the European Committee for Honoring the Prophet, a grouping of 27 Danish Muslim organizations, to raise awareness about the merits and characteristics of the Prophet.

    Ah, did you? I’ll tell you something, guys: it’s not working. To tell you the truth it’s doing the opposite of working. It’s marching smartly backwards. The more you try to force me to admire and love the prophet, the more I hate the very word. You might be better off if you could grasp that. A lot of people don’t like being told what to think about this or that long-dead religious figure. We even more don’t like it when people try to force us to think something in particular about this or that long-dead religious figure. We find it an imposition, and an impertinence, and a species of bullying, and we do not like it. If I were you I would give it up. You’re teaching people to hate your religion, not to admire it.

  • Raped for Opposing Mugabe

    MDC Information Director says over 500 women and girls have been sexually abused in the political violence.

  • Free Parking for ‘Religious Leaders’ in Barnet

    ‘The importance of religion to many Barnet residents cannot be underestimated and the council has acknowledged this.’

  • ‘Danish Muslims’ Plan to Take Motoons to Court

    ‘Muslim organizations intend to take the case to the European Court of Human Rights,’ said ‘leader.’

  • Mugabe Preparing to be Sworn In

    Government sources say Mugabe has won by a huge margin. Right.

  • Strategy to Bomb and Murder Until Election

    Minutes of a meeting include instructions to kill opposition MPs and the prevention of any MDC rallies.

  • How to be topp

    Hmm. Topp intellectuals is it.

    Number 1, Fethullah Gülen –

    An Islamic scholar with a global network of millions of followers…an inspirational leader who encourages a life guided by moderate Islamic principles…a threat to Turkey’s secular order…fled Turkey after being accused of undermining secularism.

    Number 3, Yusuf al-Qaradawi. Number 6, Amr Khaled –

    …rock-star evangelist, Khaled preaches a folksy interpretation of modern Islam to millions of loyal viewers around the world. With a charismatic oratory and casual style, Khaled blends messages of cultural integration and hard work with lessons on how to live a purpose-driven Islamic life.

    Number 8, Tariq Ramadan. Hmm.

    Not all bad. Muhammad Yunus fine, Orhan Pamuk fine, Aitzaz Ahsan fine. I don’t know of Abdolkarim Soroush but he sounds good –

    Soroush, a former university professor in Tehran and specialist in chemistry, Sufi poetry, and history, is widely considered one of the world’s premier Islamic philosophers. Having fallen afoul of the mullahs thanks to his work with Iran’s democratic activists, he has lately decamped to Europe and the United States, where his essays and lectures on religious philosophy and human rights are followed closely by Iran’s reformist movement.

    Shirin Ebadi fine. Hirsi Ali of course terrific, Sen terrific. But 1, 3, 6 and 8…hmmm.

  • Louisiana’s Stealth-creationist Bill SB 733

    Barbara Forrest says advocates for science education in other states had better start preparing now.

  • A Walk to Beautiful

    Brilliant NOVA documentary about women with fistula in Ethiopia.

  • McEwan Replies to Hamilton, Pittilo to Lawson

    The purpose of a serious columnist should not be to close down debate.

  • Go Ahead, Marry an Infant

    You can have a marriage contract even with a one-year-old girl if the father approves; the father’s opinion is obligatory

  • Obama and the Jesus Machine

    Dobson may be the most feared mouth on the religious right, thanks to radio audience of 20 million.

  • Red Alert Flyers All Over Bulawayo

    Small group of singing supporters of the MDC marched through the city while the flyers clouded the horizon.

  • Guy Says McEwan Reveals Own Ignorance

    Adrian Hamilton knows better – trots out the usual platitudes.

  • Rove Calls Obama ‘Arrogant’

    ‘He’s the guy at the country club with the beautiful date, holding a martini and making snide comments.’

  • US Supreme Court Rules on Gun Rights

    Conservative majority brushes aside militia clause; Stevens calls reading strained and unpersuasive.

  • Sweden Signs Surveillance Law

    Bill allows all emails and phone calls to be monitored in the name of national security.

  • Blackwater Requests Sharia to Avoid Damages

    Shari’a law does not hold a company responsible for actions of employees performed at work.