Guest post: Law & Order: Trump Investigations Unit

Originally a comment by Screechy Monkey on Mistakes were made.

Tune in this fall for the premier of “Law & Order: Trump Investigations Unit”

Detective: “Captain, the suspect was found at the crime scene, holding the murder weapon. He had the victim’s blood running down his arms. His DNA was found under the victim’s fingernails, showing signs of a struggle. Two weeks ago, he took out a life insurance policy on the victim naming himself as beneficiary. Multiple witnesses report that he had a screaming argument with the victim earlier in the day. A search of his personal computer revealed multiple Google queries for things like ‘how to get away with murder.’”

Captain Trump: “Well, let’s just see about this.”

(walks into interrogation room)

Captain: “Did you kill your wife?”

Suspect: “No.”

C: “Ok, then, you’re free to go.”

Detective (aghast): “Captain! We have all this evidence against him!”

C (shrugs): “Man says he didn’t do it. Whaddayagonnado?”

Voiceover: “Next week, on Law & Order: Trump Investigations Unit”

Detective: “Well, we thought we had the right suspect, but it turns out that DNA evidence conclusively proves him innocent.”

(camera pans to the suspect, a young black man)

Trump: “Hang him. And then get me a Big Mac.”

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