Trauma & Influencers=$$$

But they’re influencers! They identify as enthralling!

Sadly, though, nobody wants to listen to their podcast.

Last week, Bloomberg reported that one podcast idea seriously mooted by Harry [Windsor] was to make an entire series about childhood trauma. Not just his own trauma, because he has obviously got enough mileage out of that elsewhere, but the trauma of a group best described as “world baddies”. As Bloomberg wrote, the concept of the show was as follows: “Harry would interview a procession of controversial guests, such as Vladimir Putin, Mark Zuckerberg and Donald Trump, about their early formative years and how those experiences resulted in the adults they are today.”

And Harry is just the fella to do that because…erm…

Netflix is apparently getting ready to give Harry and Meghan the chop, refusing to pay them tens of millions of dollars unless they came up with a hit as successful as their recent six-part documentary. Which they won’t, presumably, because that documentary was literally the sum total of their entire lives.

Well can’t they just do another multi-part documentary about their lives, but in…pink? Yellow? Mauve?

Their current woes, it seems, come from giving up the good stuff too early. As an entity, Harry and Meghan are only interesting for as long as they can destabilise the monarchy. Their Oprah interview did that. Their documentary did that. Harry’s book Spare did that. Archetypes did not do that, and as such was roughly as interesting as listening to changing-room chatter in the world’s most insufferable yoga studio.

That’s it, that’s their next project – Meghan and Harry’s Yoga Studio Changing Room.

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