Trump got some things wrong.

Trump’s poll numbers: The president claimed, “I was very proud to see this morning I have the highest poll numbers I’ve ever had. Part of it is because of what we’ve done on the border. I guess the other part is what we’ve done on the economy.” It’s theoretically possible Trump saw some private polling that gave him dramatically better numbers than public polling has produced, but his standing in public polling is nowhere near his highest ever — in fact, it’s down substantially from the beginning of this year.

Hmm, what happened at the beginning of this year? Oh yes, Trump started presidenting! Remember when he released all that water that California farmers needed for irrigation and just pissed it away in the Central Valley? Great start.

A New York Times polling average put Trump’s approval rating at about 43% as of Tuesday (with 54% disapproval), down from 52% approval in the first week of his second term in January (with 43% disapproval).

Yes but that’s the New York Times. Ask the Trump Bullshit Gazette and you’ll get a totally different polling average.

Trump also claimed that under his leadership, “grocery prices are down.” False. Average grocery prices have increased during Trump’s presidency, though the prices of some individual items have fallen; Consumer Price Index figures show that average grocery prices were about 1% higher in August than they were in January, when Trump returned to the White House.

That’s what he said! He just used different words, that’s all.

Trump said electricity in Europe is much more expensive than in China or the US, which is generally correct. But then he added, “And our bills are coming way down.” In fact, US electricity prices are spiking, rising more than twice as fast as overall prices; Consumer Price Index figures show they were about 6.2% higher in August than they were a year prior and about 4.9% higher in August than they were in January.

That’s what he meant by “coming down.” Sheesh, reporters just can’t give Trump a break, can they.

Trump called climate change “the greatest con job ever perpetrated on the world,” and he also referred to “the global warming hoax.” He didn’t precisely explain what he was calling the con job or hoax, but global warming is a demonstrated fact. Trump also baselessly suggested that scientists now use the phrase “climate change” instead of “global warming” so that they can’t be accused of getting things wrong if the world ends up cooling; in reality, climate scientists use both phrases, often saying “global warming” when referring to the long-term trend of increasing global temperature and “climate change” when referring to the numerous effects the world is experiencing because of that trend.

Whatever. It was cold somewhere today. Did they check Alaska? Greenland? The top of Chomolungma?

NASA says on its website: “‘Climate change’ encompasses global warming, but refers to the broader range of changes that are happening to our planet. These include rising sea levels; shrinking mountain glaciers; accelerating ice melt in Greenland, Antarctica and the Arctic; and shifts in flower/plant blooming times.”

For example, a 2023 report from the UN’s climate change panel, titled “Climate Change 2023: Synthesis Report,” said this: “Human activities, principally through emissions of greenhouse gases, have unequivocally caused global warming, with global surface temperature reaching 1.1°C above 1850-1900 in 2011-2020.” In a section titled “Future Climate Change,” the report also said this: “Continued greenhouse gas emissions will lead to increasing global warming, with the best estimate of reaching 1.5°C in the near term in considered scenarios and modelled pathways. Every increment of global warming will intensify multiple and concurrent hazards (high confidence).”

These are all just trivial details that don’t matter. Bigger picture: Trump is a brilliant genius who should have multiple Nobel Prizes and his very own fire engine.