The womb is not only a vessel for bringing in souls to the physical plane
Remember detox? Remember detox socks? No, you probably don’t, because it was seven years ago, but I do, because it was so absurd.
The ‘detox’ question is pretty amusing.
In the majority of cases, producers and retailers contacted by the young scientists were forced to admit that they are renaming mundane things, like cleaning or brushing, as ‘detox’. They range in price from £1-2 for a detox drink to £36.95 for detox bath accessories.
Hahahaha – are there detox rubber duckies? Detox loofahs? Detox washcloths? All priced at ten times the normal rate because of their magical detox powers which the producers and retailers have admitted they don’t actually have?
The dossier shows that, while companies and individuals now use the claim ‘detox’ to promote everything from foot patches to hair straighteners, they are unable to provide reliable evidence or consistent explanations of what the ‘detox’ process is supposed to be.
Foot patches! Hahahahahahaha. ‘What’s that, Joe?’ ‘It’s my detox foot patch.’ ‘Oh yes, of course.’ Hair straighteners! Detox hair straighteners! Hahahahahahaha.
But this item is more horrifying than funny, even though it is full of absurd bullshit. The site is called Embrace Pangaea, and it tells you to detox your “womb” by sticking herbal “detox pearls” into it and leaving them there for three days. (Actually of course you can’t stick things in your uterus the way you can stick them in your pocket, so the pearls would just sit in the vagina.)
The womb is the sixth elimination organ for women. The womb is not only a vessel for bringing in souls to the physical plane, but also a vessel that can hold on to emotional, physical, and spiritual pain and trauma. The herbal womb detox pearls have been specially created with ancient herbs that are effective at cleaning the womb.
No. No, no, no. The uterus mostly cleans itself, and if it doesn’t you need a doctor, not a little bag of garbage sitting in the vadge for three days. I foresee wrongful death lawsuits in Embrace Pangaea’s future.
Health experts warn the public about a new type of “womb detox” that involves inserting herbal balls into the vagina. The product promises to cleanse the uterus, but for health professionals, it may only cause irritation and the deadly toxic shock syndrome.
The product called “herbal womb detox pearls” are being sold online by U.S. company Embrace Pangaea. The firm claims that the herbal balls can correct foul odor, bacterial vaginosis, fibroids, endometriosis and yeast infections.
“Herbal womb detox pearls are designed to cleanse the womb and return it to a balanced state,” the company’s website states.
I wonder what makes them think they know the pearls do any such thing. I suspect the answer is nothing – I suspect they just thought it would be a pleasant thing, like lighting a scented candle next to the bathtub, so they threw some herbs into some little pouches, and hey presto detox pearls. They smell nice, so they must detox the “womb” if you shove them up yourself, right? Only you would think a familiarity with how tampons work would disabuse them of that idea…
Embrace Pangaea recommends inserting the balls into the vagina for at least three days for best results. For ob-gyn and a pain medicine physician Dr. Jen Gunter, the entire idea and process is not only pointless but also harmful to women’s health.
Gunter explains that leaving the herbal balls for three days inside the vagina can promote the growth of bad bacteria and subsequently cause infection.
Gunter also wrote that putting stuff inside the vagina for too long a period may cause toxic shock syndrome, which has already claimed the lives of many. This is also one of the reasons why women are instructed to not leave tampons inside the vagina for more than eight hours.
In short the people behind this Pangaea place really didn’t stop to think at all, let alone do any research – yet they felt happy advertising their dangerous product to a credulous public.
Stick to the detox socks, they’re fraudulent but at least they’re not dangerous.
Oh, lordy. Yes, I remember.
(I also remember Gwyneth Paltrow’s excitement over getting a “vaginal steam” which was supposed to have cleansing powers. Not as potentially dangerous as this, but still a really really bad idea. I think I learned about that here…IIRC.)
Yup. What’s next, grilling?
That one too cited Jen Gunter on why that is not a good idea at all whatsoever thank you very much.
Dr Jen Gunter also wrote about these vagina ‘detox’ kits. And for good measure, see also Don’t use a Japanese vagina stick to “tighten” your vagina, okay?.
Toxic Shock Syndrome was in the news right about the time I was hitting puberty and learning all about how to use tampons, pads, etc. It was VERY scary. This just makes me shudder.
Way back in the day, ‘womb’ potions were sold all over the place for ‘irregular menses’ etc. What most of them really contained was ergot. They were abortifacients, stealth marketed to desperate women. And certainly dangerously toxic.
I suppose Embrace Pangea might be laying down precedent for a post Roe v. Wade marketing opportunity… but that would mean they had a clue what they were doing.
It’s actually Pangaea, even though for some reason English speakers insist on pronouncing it PanGEEa…which makes no sense whatever since neither Greek nor Latin nor English has a soft g before a.