Our role as feminists

UN Women giving away women’s rights and self-definition and reality again:

One, no, people don’t have a blanket right to identify themselves the way they want to. That’s just not true. All of us barring one person lack the right to identify ourselves as the president of the US. We can’t identify ourselves inaccurately if we’re stopped for reckless driving and have to show our driver’s license. We can’t identify ourselves as little Kathy’s mommy and take her home from school if we’re not little Kathy’s mommy. It’s just not true, yet people keep saying it. We can fantasize however we like, but once we involve other people, it’s not that simple. It’s not even close to that simple.

And two – what the fuck? Like hell it’s our role as feminists to “always be there” – it’s our role as feminists to refuse to be the sex that’s expected to “always be there.” It’s often our role as friends, mothers, daughters, sisters, employees, colleagues, comrades to be there – but as feminists? No. And always be there for men who say they “identify as” women and that therefore we have to agree that they are women? No no no no NO.

And three, same again. No that’s not our role as feminists. It may or may not be our role as other things, but not as feminists. And mostly not even as other things. Being there is one thing, accepting people for who they are is another. It depends. It depends on who, in fact, they are. There are plenty of things that people can be that motivate me not to accept them for it, because the things are bad. I don’t accept Donald Trump for who he is – I passionately furiously with disgust and contempt and fury reject Donald Trump for who he is. I’m disappointed that Jeffrey Toobin hopped onto that list the other day. Ivanka Trump’s place on it is solid.

Just stop. Stop. UN Women is for women, not women plus men who “identify as” women. Stop making new rules that mean women can’t have anything at all to themselves. Just stop.

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