Corrections

Well let’s face it, wims, your bodies just are ugly. We know it, you know it, the whole world knows it. We try to be polite about it but when we want to show off our fabulous new swimsuits it would be stupid to get lumpy bulgy clumsy women to do it. It takes a man to model a women’s swimsuit.

Adidas has come under fire for advertising a female-style swimming costume using a model with a penis.

That’s the small polite kind of bulge. Not like those sloppy bobbly breast things, let alone those giant buttocks.

See how beautiful???? Who would dream of replacing that with a woman?

The move has prompted criticism from campaigners for women’s equality in sport, who argue that the use of a biologically male model for a women’s swimsuit creates unrealistic body expectations for women.

Oh come on. Wah wah wah. Can’t you girls grow up for a change? It’s not unrealistic to expect a woman to look like the guy with the flat chest and bulgy groin: all you whiners have to do is lay off the cheesecake for a few days.

Adidas is not the first global brand to be criticised for using biologically male trans models in advertising campaigns.

Budweiser recently faced a backlash for using trans influencer Dylan Mulvaney on its cans of Bud Light.

And when Mulvaney featured in a Nike bra advert, this also prompted calls from consumers for a boycott of the Nike brand.

Sigh. How many times do we have to go over this? Men just do everything better, okay? We know it, you know it, everybody knows it, so just stop whining and go watch a real housewives of somewhere show.

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