In things that never happened…

I think the BBC is telling a whopper here.

A teenage boy who was sexually assaulted by two women woke up with his clothes removed and injuries to his head and body, Sussex Police have said. The 15-year-old was walking along Cants Lane in Burgess Hill before heading through a wooded area towards World’s End at about 18:15 BST on 4 June. He was assaulted and woke up on the floor, police said.

The floor? The forested area has a floor? Ffs Beeb, you’re not teenagers. He woke up on the ground.

But more to the point – I don’t believe you. Women don’t sexually assault teenage boys. Why would they? What would be the payoff?

Both women were between 18 and 20 years old, one being 6ft 3in (1.9m) tall and with bright dyed red hair.

A 6ft 3in woman sexually assaulting a boy in a wooded area? Nope, I don’t believe you.

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