Listen up, people, words are magic, and that’s all you need to know. Simple.
https://twitter.com/rachelvmckinnon/status/1102265197547474945
Self-identification=reality. Simple. In other words, what people say about themselves is true, period, end of story. Simple.
So if someone tells you she’s a beluga whale, she is a beluga whale. Simple.
If someone tells you he’s Denali, he is Denali. Simple.
Words are magic. Simple. Anyone who says otherwise is An Enemy of the People. (What if she says she isn’t An Enemy of the People? That question is against the law.)
Now that we know words are magic, life is going to become a whole lot simpler. I can’t wait to get started.
Comments
17 responses to “Simp simp simple”
Prairie dogs are dogs.
Cuttlefish are fish.
Peanuts are nuts.
A family tree is a tree.
This is fun.
Donald Trump is a stable genius…
I am the Queen of Romania.
I am a ham and pineapple pizza
I yam what I yam.
I yam what I yam.
Lady M., have you demoted your identity? I thought you were the Queen of Everything.
I am an otter. (I would be the walrus, but Paul is already the walrus. He identified as that way back in the 1960s, even before we were all so woke).
I am the Eggman. goo goo ga choo.
McKinnon identifies as a philosopher.
I am not depressed. Boom! Take that, mental illness!
…
Wait, it didn’t work. I’m having some doubts about this system.
Yeah, and I still can’t swim, even after declaring my identity as an otter. But I defy any assigned otter at birth TEROs to suggest that means I cannot be an otter, because that is doing real violence to me.
Iknklast, if you say you’re an otter and you can’t swim, it just means swimming is not an inherently otter…ish ability. How dare any of those Cis-otters deny your otterhood just because of your lack of buoyancy!
AofS, don’t be silly. If I’m the Queen of Everything, stands to reason I must be the Queen of Romania. That’s logic.
I feel silly now! It seems that after trying to make sense of the whole ‘men are women’ thing my logic has gone the way of my irony meter. ‘SPOIIIIING!’.
And yet somehow I am still a cripple. The new regime isn’t working out for me at all.
Lady M: Romania is an excellent choice, I am very fond of the place and its people. But…. I still kind of hope that your rule is malevolent. That probably makes me a bad person, but I can always identify as a good person so problem solved. Maybe this is better than I thought.
latsot, as a diehard fan of Gothic fiction, I promise you I will rule Romania with an iron hand (in a striking glove of black lace, which goes well with my elaborate garnet choker.)