Dude’s embroiled

First world problems

Lately, I’ve been embroiled in what feels like constant conversations about pronouns. The wrong ones. The right ones. The preferred ones. Hint: That third category is defunct.

Of course, by “wrong” he doesn’t mean the kind of wrong where you’re learning the language and make mistakes sometimes, he means the kind of wrong where you forget or refuse to memorize anyone’s specialty pronouns.

As a nonbinary trans person who uses they/them/theirs pronouns as my terms of address, I suppose I should be celebrating this influx of discourse on the proper usage of pronouns. Truthfully, I’m exhausted.

That is, as a presumptuous narcissist he’s exhausted from trying to force people to use specialty pronouns for special him.

We don’t use pronouns that refer to us. He doesn’t “use” they/them/theirs pronouns as his terms of address, he tries to order other people to use them, which is both narcissistic and stupid. Then to make it even more so he writes an article about it. Climate change? Ukraine? Homelessness? Democracies falling to strongman dictators everywhere? Pfffff never mind all that, focus on this guy’s Luxury Pronouns.

In the six years since I have “come out,” I’ve witnessed the concept of pronoun inclusivity shift from fundamentally Martian to hotly contested.

Pronoun inclusivity! That’s a new one! Who knew pronouns were a select club?

Personally, within several of my closest relationships, the fact that I require ungendered pronouns when referring to me in the third person has become the source of deep strain and disappointment.

He requires luxury pronouns? Like, what, the way fish require water? He’ll die without them?

Nah, he “requires” them in the sense that he orders other people – even, apparently, his closes friends – to use them. It’s a wonder he has any friends.

But I feel duped by some of the positive reactions from my friends and loved ones when I initially came out as transmasc/nonbinary. In retrospect, that was the easy part. I was the only one changing.

One, wtf is “transmasc/nonbinary”? I know of someone else – a woman – who claims to be that, but how do people know they’re that as opposed to, say, just plain a trans man?

Anyway. The piece goes on and on after that. Paragraph after paragraph, all about him and his pronouns. This ideology is an absolute poison pill for the whole idea that it’s a good idea to grow up and realize the world doesn’t revolve around Precious Self.

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