Interrupting

Wadhwa has issued a statement.

https://twitter.com/EdinRapeCrisis/status/1425826673170083848

It says that as if we were longing to hear more from him, rather than much much less. He probably wrote the tweet himself.

I am writing this because I want to make clear what I said on the Guilty Feminist Podcast, whilst I wish my language had been clearer, a few sentences in particular have been taken out of context. My input on the podcast is based on almost two decades of experience I have in working to tackle violence against women and support survivors of sexual violence.

But he’s still a man. He’s still a man who feels entitled to be CEO of a rape crisis shelter. Whatever decades of experience he may have he’s still a man, forcing himself on women.

Let me make this very clear, if a woman engages with our services, through any route, and she feels she is not comfortable with the support worker allocated to her, we will of course, prioritise that need and will do whatever we can to provide the right support – this is the very basis of a person-centred approach and is a foundation of service delivery in advocacy work and support services across a number of sectors.

But she will have to ask. We won’t just refrain from allocating a man to her, we will make it her problem, so that she will have that to deal with in addition to the rape.

Alongside this, it is also critical that we act as proactive bystanders and lead by example as an organisation dedicated to equality and human rights. If what we see/hear from someone is clearly prejudiced and we are not responding to their urgent support need it is also part of our role to provide a space to explore and challenge this, in as kind a way as possible.

And by “is clearly prejudiced” he means “is able to recognize a man when she sees one.” She sees a man, and tries to get away from him, and the staff explores and challenges this instead of providing the support she is there to find.

In order for us to create a safe space for survivors it also needs to be a safe space for staff and volunteers, where everyone feels valued, safe and respected.

Except women who want to be in a women-only shelter in the wake of being raped. They won’t feel valued, safe, and respected.

That must be a priority if we are to be an ethical service provider for all survivors using our service, as well as an employer, taking seriously our role in creating a fairer society; this would be the case for any prejudice experienced be it racism, classism, homophobia, anti-Semitism, Islamophobia, or transphobia.

That’s not even true. Ambulance crews don’t pause to try to re-educate the person on the stretcher on classism or homophobia. Fire crews don’t cut the hoses to re-educate the bigots whose house is in flames. Nurses don’t pause intubating a patient to explain trans doctrine.

I, the Edinburgh Rape Crisis Centre or the Rape Crisis movement in Scotland is not looking to re-educate survivors when they come in for the urgent, potentially life-saving support they may need – that would be inappropriate. What we can do, when they are ready and if they are interested, is to help them take part in wider discussions about how violence against women is a cause and a consequence of a deeply unequal and sexist society.

But he’s a man. We don’t want to hear it from him. He’s the wrong person to be telling women that. He shouldn’t even be there.

When I speak about sexual violence and domestic abuse, I speak from my experiences; as a migrant, as a woman of colour and as a trans woman – I am open about all of that, because being open about our experiences and being able to tell our own stories is one way that we can create a fairer society and fight back against the inequality that silences us.

There’s that ploy again – he gets to count himself twice, because he’s a woman of colour and a trans woman. He gets to count himself as more oppressed than mere women, because he’s a woman and a trans woman.

I am drawing a line under the podcast and in desperate hope that my words here are understood in full and with the compassion and integrity I am writing with.

So that’ll be zero then. You got it.

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