Originally a comment by Your Name’s not Bruce? on Web of confusion.
Youâve just announced that you think of girl-being as a matter of self-identifying rather than fact or body, so you donât center the experiences of young women and girls, you center the experiences of people who tell you they think of themselves as women or girls.
You canât do both. You canât insist that being female is a matter of âidentifying asâ and still pretend you center the experience of female people.
Iâll bet the TiMs attending would be some pissed off it it ended up being all TiMs and only TiMs in attendence. I think thatâs why they insist on having it both ways. They need women and girls there to validate them, to show everyone theyâre just âone of the girls.â They canât do that if itâs a total TiM sausage fest. Then theyâd be being ghettoized, and theyâd have to find some group with actual validating females in it so they could join. Again. Any exclusively TiM accomodation (which youâd think theyâd be happy with) denies them the validation that sharing exropriating womenâs facilities and resources they crave. A sporting event made up entirely of TiMs would be a complete failure. Theyâd just be competing against other cheats. Whereâs the fun (or validation) in that?
As much as theyâd hate to admit it, they need women present. Women are the secret ingedient that they canât do without because TiMs canât validate each other. It doesnât work that way. How many âtrans lesbiansâ date other âtrans lesbiansâ? The âcotton ceilingâ doesnât refer to TiMs. Why is that? Without actual lesbians in the mix, any TiM is just a heterosexual male, and they know it. Itâs really quite a bind theyâve put themselves into, and theyâre doing their damnedest to use women to get themselves out of it. But thereâs no resolving this inherent contradiction, especially when gatekeeping women âwithholdâ the validation that TiMs so desperately need. Why canât women just shut up and be kind?
Itâs just like the attempted hostile takeover of the word âwoman.â Changing the meaning of the word âwomanâ so that it includes men destroys the meaning theyâre so desperate to latch onto. If women abandoned the word and took up a new one for themselves, TiMs would come around to appropriate that new word too. They canât be their âtrue selvesâ without women being forced to accept them as women. Itâs like TiMs are trying to extract some sort of stamp of authenticity from the women theyâre forcing themselves on. Itâs sick and twisted. Just as TiMs reject third spaces for toilet facilities, open categories in sports, trans exclusive rape crisis accomodations and counselling, they demand access to womenâs spaces and, ironically, womenâs approval. Anything else marks them out as not being women, which of course, theyâre not. I canât but imagine that helplessness in the face of this insurmountable contradiction must fuel some of their anger.
Women who refuse to submit quietly underline the fundamental untruth and delusion behind gender ideology and its demands. Without women, any gathering of TiMs is just a bunch of guys in dresses. Women are the needed, forced audience. Itâs no fun if youâre not transgressing anything or anyone. Who do you lord it over and demand âcenteringâ from if not women? Being given your own facilities robs you of the validation that using womenâs facilities supplies you with. Third spaces will never be acceptable because theyâre transphobic, cutting you off from the womenâs spaces you need and deserve. If women pack up their tent and leave, you will follow them, because like it or not, you need them. Women are the fact that wonât go away, and that you canât let escape.
